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Thursday, June 17, 2004

Time To Build A Fire

My youngest son is now 31/2 going on 4 and he is a reminder of my fire. I think it’s time to build one. No, I’m not crazy or all of a sudden struck with an inability to communicate in any articulate form. I have a story to share and then you will understand.

I was pregnant with this beautiful baby. Not my first, but my second miracle baby. See, I had been told at 19 to have a hysterectomy due to recurring difficulties with endometriosis and ovarian cysts and there was no way I could ever have children. Thanks to God and my mother and some very encouraging Doctors (and my husband) I conceived and successfully delivered baby boy #1.

Then, after three years of frustration, I found myself blessed with the unheard of and unprecedented baby boy #2. I was working with a local parks and recreation department at the time. I was not a Christian, but believed in God in my way but not His way.

My job was stressful, my marriage was going downhill and my attitude stunk. Well, God knew me before I knew him. I am always amazed to look back at my life, at the times God loved me and cared for me even before I acknowledged Him. It shouldn’t surprise me though, the wind blows weather I believe in it or not. The sun will still shine even if I don’t think it should. And God was and is and will be I AM.

So God took me and placed me at a conference. I am a Certified Therapeutic Recreation Specialist and thus have to attend conferences and things to maintain this credential. Another important point to the story is I have a Native American Heritage that is dear to me.

Well, here I was, pregnant, down in the dumps, feeling sorry for myself and hating life. There was a camp fire lit in a clearing throughout the entire conference. An Ojibwa man I did not know tended the fire all day and all evening every day for the 4 days we were there. He explained the fire had been lit from coals from another fire months before. And that fire had been started from the one before it and so on going back to the original fire. It was a ripple effect. There is a group of people spreading Peace by spreading the fire.(I have to hunt down the website because this fire has been spread all over the world-kinda like the WORD)

The fire gave me both warmth and comfort inside and out. At night it gave me peace and safety. But the fire also gave so many things I was not aware of at the time. I was impressed how much care this man gave to the fire. Not worship, by any means. But just as A. and Godseeker tend to their plants, this man tended to his fire. At the end of the conference the fire had to go out. But not the concept. The man took pieces of cloth and twine and wrapped the now cool coals. Each person took one to take home. His instructions to me were to keep the coals for when you know to build the fire.

I have had the coals for almost 4 years. I have thought once or twice about building a fire with them, but it never seemed right. It does now. You see I was at a turning point then as I feel I am now. I had decisions to make that were looming and the Lord gave me the solitude and peace I needed to sort it out. Shortly after that conference I had my baby. I had a new job. I began to attend a church and search for God. I believe the Lord used that fire and the Native American to reach me. This was a person I could relate to and spend time with just sitting, not talking. That is what I did most of the days of that conference.
I keep thinking how the Cherokee believe fire comes from The Creator as a gift. As tradition, you would light the first fire of the season from the coals of the season before. Each fire had coals from the previous one. A weaving of the lives from year to year, a ripple effect.

I believe in the great Creator God. He is the one who created fire and man. He ties us together from year to year, generation to generation. He was the fire in the desert in OT times that led and guided. He is the fire in my life now. Just like the Ojibwa I enjoyed being with so many years ago, I need to tend to my fire. I need to keep it stoked and allow God to burn in my life. I have been wandering in my heart, mind and spirit for a few months now.
I think it’s time to build a fire.

9 comments:

Godseeker said...

Wow!!!!!!! Maybe--would it be all right to sit with you as you tend your fire?

-Godseeker

heiress said...

I can't think of anyone else I would rather have than my Selah sisters! Pending local fire codes, I think I will have a little fire in the back Saturday night. I plan on setting up a tent for the boys and maybe even roasting some marshmellows in honor of Godseeker. ;)
You'll are welcome, you know the place.

amy m. provine said...

That would be purty cool!

heiress said...

We've got a lot going on Sat. but the fire/camp out is on. Probably after diner, around 7 or 7:30pm. Bring the kids. Heck, you're welcome to bring sleeping bags and have a slumber party! Suppose to be nice out.

Godseeker said...

Ooh, sorry. I didn't mean to invite myself to your campout. If you want us there, that's neat--but I was thinking we were figuratively sitting with you as you tended your fire. I guess that's kind of what we've been doing all along. Selah sisters.

-Godseeker

Godseeker said...

But hey--it sounds wonderful, if you really want us there.

BTW, Heiress, I've had time to "savor" your blog. I love it that you ran into someone you could just sit around with and share some silence. Those people are rare and memorable.

heiress said...

Don't feel you've invited yourself! A-my Selah sisters are always welcome at my home. B-as I was writing I almost asked you to come but were afraid it might seem "dorky". I should know better, but yes even I(every now and then) worry about what others think. My hubby is out for the weekend. So I am camping in the backyard Saturday night. Then we can do a bonfire. I would love the gals and kids to come. The kids can play in the tent and on the swigset. We could sing some songs, tell some stories, and just be together.
Yes, this Ojibway man was very restful. I don't even know his name. But if he ever were to stumble here, thanks.

amy m. provine said...

"afraid it might seem "dorky". I should know better"

Yep, we are dorks :) I've been thinking about the fire more. I think its such a neat concept to share a peice of the old fire when starting a new fire. You know that I'm totally clueless. I hope that the fire will kindle up in us a new momentum that we can build off of and get out of these life's doldrums, or at least maybe kindle a few good stories :)

I'll see you there most likely.

amy

heiress said...

Thank you to my sisters that could come to the fire. Thank you to those that were with us in spirit. And glory to the Father and the Son for the peace and fellowship that occurred.
The music played, the marshmallows roasted and the fire sparked. It was wonderful to share with the children this tradition. My oldest son was especially thrilled to be a part. He wanted to make fire bundles for his friends just like I did for mine.
We said our prayers that night and thanked the Lord for the stars that gave us night lights, the lightening bugs in the tent (thanks to a well meaning child) and the fire. The fire that gives us hope, warmth, guidance and sustains us.
We slept in tents that night. I love waking up to the sunshine peaking in the tent, the birds singing. The air is cool and slightly damp from the dew. You just want to snuggle deep down into the sleeping bag and stay all day. I ventured out of the tent to the crisp grass.
There were the remains of last night’s fire and on the small yellow picnic table placed nearby for little ones to sit and eat their sores was a red bird. He cocked his head and chirped a morning hello. Not to me but to his mate who was perched on a neighboring wire. Cardinals in Cherokee tradition are the birds of truth and direction. I couldn’t help but feel the loving hands of the Lord wrap around me. He had answered my prayers. I felt comforted. El Shadi would once again take care of my emotional needs and comfort me in his arms.
It was a good fire.